Bullying V horseplay

[Pete999]

Seeing as my last post got such a good reception, I though well Pete you're on a roll lets give it another go, I haven't been on what constitutes a site for a long time now, and did see a lot of Apprentices getting bullied, me for example, when I was a mere Lad, oh and believe it or not I walked out on a part time job a few weeks ago for being accused of bullying, anyone who knows me will tell you it's virtually impossible for me to be classed as a bully but that's another story.

Just wondered what experience you blokes and blokesses have encountered.

 

[markc123]

I'm gonna face a torrent abuse for my views here probably, but this is just my opinion - not trying to upset anyone. Are we talking physical or non-physical here?

Unless its physical then bullying to me really is a nuisance word thats chucked around willy nilly. If someone calls me a **** or whatever - of if 10people call me a ****, then i just ignore them and crack on with what I'm doing. Some people are far too sensitive, and get themselves worked up over someone arguing with them. In any trade you need a thick skin imo.

If it is physical then you either report whoever, or get out of the situation as fast as you can and take further action from a distance.

Mark.

 

[UNG]

Unfortunately in this PC world we now live in it becoming harder to offer advice or to criticise without someone taking offence even if they are not directly involved
The onsite banter is now very often taken the wrong way and the "apprentices trade tests and stores visits" are deemed to be some form of cruelity
Every reception desk you go to has some form of warning against staff abuse that has varying threshold levels depending on how helpful the staff want to be, even raising your voice is taken as abuse or bullying by some.
There are people who can give it out but can't take it, it takes all sorts to make the world go round and whoever coined the phrase "politically correct" has a lot to answer for
A sense of humour is going the same way as common sense and it won't be long before it is total banished in public

 

[Spoon]

It's hard to say. You can't say that all verbal abuse is not bullying. It all depends on what was said, about who and in what manner. Say what you like about me, but say things about my kids or missus and that's a different matter....

 

[SS-2015]

Yeah I agree, You can't get the slightest bit upset with someone these days without it being classed as abusive.
Abusive behavior/Bulling in my mind is something that is ongoing very personal and hurtful. Telling someone they're a C*** because they have done something C***ish is how you learn in my opinion.
A company I have a lot of dealings with has around 6 young apprentices and they are all so sheepish and scared of everything and it's the Mamby Pamby world they're bought up in that does it to them.

If you're going to work in a blokes world which is invariably what most trade jobs are then you need to man up!

 

[Pete999]

It's hard to say. You can't say that all verbal abuse is not bullying. It all depends on what was said, about who and in what manner. Say what you like about me, but say things about my kids or missus and that's a different matter....

I used to work overseas a lot with small engineering teams, about 6 blokes, for periods of about 8 to 10 weeks depending on the job, bearing in mind some of these places I went to weren't the holiday resorts like Spain etc.
There was one particular guy who was a master at winding people up, this to me was bullying as it continued after work, and believe it did get you down, you couldn't smack him otherwise you would be sent home to pick your cards up, although on one occasion he was taken round the back of the hut and given a stiff talking to, up close and personal, no name no pack drill, he didn't learn though and as far as I know he is still at it, one day someone will hang one on him.

 

[Spoon]

But then are is the other side where a worker is a c*** and likes to bully apprentices ( cause he's a low life and tried to make himself feel better ). Never been bullied at work. I guy did try once. Kept saying comments about my girlfriend (now my missus.) I got bored and said I was going to dump her and sh*g his daughter instead.... He didn't say anything again.

 

[ruston]

Fair hard criticism from someone you respect is a lesson you never forget.
Banter is one thing , but when it gets to be a vendetta is when it gets serious.
I have never worked in a group without banter, it is usually a fairly unoffensive way of making your feelings known.
Bullies should be removed from sites; no if's no but's.

 

[Andy78]

It's so hard to say what constitutes bullying and what is banter. A lot of it can depend on the person saying it and how it's said for example. Some guys I have worked with have called me allsorts and I know they are just messing, but I wouldn't take exactly the same things said by others. A lot of it is to do with context.

I would definitely say that verbal bullying and the way people act can be just as bad as physical bullying though. Both need to be viewed the same if a person is being victimised. There's site banter and there's being downright nasty.

One example of where the line was crossed was with a lad known as "Dirty Dick" He was a weirdo. Came to work in his lasses knickers, used to take a dump in the site toilets, naked, with all the doors open, got caught second fixing outside lights wearing nowt but a toolbelt, took dumps in his own toolbox..... you get the picture.
A younger spark was on his knees second fixing sockets. Dick walked up behind him, flopped his tail out on the lads shoulder, then called his name so he turned his head and got a faceful. The young lad was not impressed and Dick learned he had taken it too far with this guy. Getting pinned against a wall with a termy driver up at your throat will do that for you.

 

[ian.settle1]

It's so hard to say what constitutes bullying and what is banter. A lot of it can depend on the person saying it and how it's said for example. Some guys I have worked with have called me allsorts and I know they are just messing, but I wouldn't take exactly the same things said by others. A lot of it is to do with context.

I would definitely say that verbal bullying and the way people act can be just as bad as physical bullying though. Both need to be viewed the same if a person is being victimised. There's site banter and there's being downright nasty.

One example of where the line was crossed was with a lad known as "Dirty Dick" He was a weirdo. Came to work in his lasses knickers, used to take a dump in the site toilets, naked, with all the doors open, got caught second fixing outside lights wearing nowt but a toolbelt, took dumps in his own toolbox..... you get the picture.
A younger spark was on his knees second fixing sockets. Dick walked up behind him, flopped his tail out on the lads shoulder, then called his name so he turned his head and got a faceful. The young lad was not impressed and Dick learned he had taken it too far with this guy. Getting pinned against a wall with a termy driver up at your throat will do that for you.

Sounds like this guy has got a slate loose.

 

[Andy78]

Sounds like this guy has got a slate loose.

Lol, 95% of the time he was a completely normal guy to get on with and work with. I think he was just a rampant pervert that had never been discouraged, just ignored. Just had quite a few issues with accepted social boundaries.... lol

Believe me, he knew he had gone beyond a laugh with this incident. Like a church mouse for the next fortnight.

 

[Spoon]

Aren't the majority of electrical engineers rampant perverts....

 

[ruston]

That's a shocking revelation.:blush5:

 

[Andy78]

Aren't the majority of electrical engineers rampant perverts....

No idea, but he certainly was no engineer. He tried an end-in-ear but that's what got him threatened....

 

[Leesparkykent]

Banter and a little bit of abuse when they deserve it is character building For the young apprentices :wink_smile:.