Bullying V horseplay

[Pete999]

Seeing as my last post got such a good reception, I though well Pete you're on a roll lets give it another go, I haven't been on what constitutes a site for a long time now, and did see a lot of Apprentices getting bullied, me for example, when I was a mere Lad, oh and believe it or not I walked out on a part time job a few weeks ago for being accused of bullying, anyone who knows me will tell you it's virtually impossible for me to be classed as a bully but that's another story.

Just wondered what experience you blokes and blokesses have encountered.

 

[Andy78]

Banter and a little bit of abuse when they deserve it is character building For the young apprentices :wink_smile:.

Some of the stories I have heard from guys that will now be retired about their apprenticeships ..... if some of that stuff went on now people would be going to court !!

 

[Leesparkykent]

Some of the stories I have heard from guys that will now be retired about their apprenticeships ..... if some of that stuff went on now people would be going to court !!

I've heard some proper tails as well, like you say couldn't get away with it now! I took it on my apprenticeship, it was all part of it lol.

 

[ruston]

Blackjack (tarry grease) around the privates was a common one.

 

[Andy78]

Blackjack (tarry grease) around the privates was a common one.

Red lead I've heard, as a birthday treat.

 

[ruston]

Red lead I've heard, as a birthday treat.

Now that is cruel.

 

[Aurai]

This may help

Bullying and harassment are very simply, and only defined as how the recipient sees it. No matter what you meant as a joke, for instance, if it is received as humiliating or degrading by the recipient, it is bullying or harassment.

However, it is still not bullying or harassment until the recipient actually complains. In a work context.

This means that banter, in all its workplace forms, can continue, until the person on the end of it asks you to stop. Only and only then, should you continue, are you a bully. Employers, should set up the communication channels and encourage people to come forward if they feel bullied enough to want to complain.

Sadly, the usual British situation is that the bullied, may not know how to complain, then may tolerate the treatment until they blow! Or, more usually, move on.

All of us have a responsibility to protect people who need protecting, of course, but it is a jungle out there.

 

[Pete999]

Some of the stories I have heard from guys that will now be retired about their apprenticeships ..... if some of that stuff went on now people would be going to court !!

I.ll tel you a story, I had an Apprentice straight from School, bit of a Muppet, but weren't we all, anyway he hated getting his barnet dirty, and we were rewiring council houses so you get the picture.
He was really peeing me off in this particular house and as we were finishing he did something stupid, more stupid than usual, I asked him where my pliers were, and told him to find them or else, under the floor he went down went the flooring great big chest and carpet on top, al you could hear was the little dipstick screaming.As you say if I did it now I would be had up for abuse, it was funny for a while, but soon realised that perhaps I had gone to far so I let him out, not happy he wasn't worried about spiders in his hair. I felt bad afterwards.

 

[Diddy]

Well I served my time with a local contractor where he had say upto 100 men on the books. So as an apprentice you were rotated around jobs and mentors (sparks) to give you an overall grasp of being a spark. In my time I was humiliated in front of women on nights out by a guy who was just an arrogant insecure ----. I have been well into giving and taking banter.....I even had my privates painted black.....but I deserved that lol. I have met all types in my time......Its just like in life you will come across all sorts....it is how you deal with it that matters. Number one for me is don't wallow and take a mans apology at face value - these things make getting through the apprenticeship easier.

 

[sparksburnout]

This may help

Bullying and harassment are very simply, and only defined as how the recipient sees it. No matter what you meant as a joke, for instance, if it is received as humiliating or degrading by the recipient, it is bullying or harassment.

However, it is still not bullying or harassment until the recipient actually complains. In a work context.

This means that banter, in all its workplace forms, can continue, until the person on the end of it asks you to stop. Only and only then, should you continue, are you a bully. Employers, should set up the communication channels and encourage people to come forward if they feel bullied enough to want to complain.

Sadly, the usual British situation is that the bullied, may not know how to complain, then may tolerate the treatment until they blow! Or, more usually, move on.

All of us have a responsibility to protect people who need protecting, of course, but it is a jungle out there.

Sorry mate, thats a load of b******s

 

[Adam W]

When I was at college we were advised not to engage in horseplay at all, the reason being horseplay has a habit of getting out of hand, and it can't get out of hand if it doesn't start in the first place.
I've seen it happen in the workplace - light-hearted 'banter' snowballs, push comes to shove, then before you know where you are someone has had a punch in the balls.
A laugh and a joke is one thing, but constantly having one at the expense of a colleague is stepping into dangerous territory.

 

[Adam W]

Sorry mate, thats a load of b******s

I disagree.

 

[7029 dave]

Banter is one thing, when it becomes personal that is an other.

 

[sparksburnout]

I disagree.

I might have misread your posts Adam but you can't have it both ways. You are right, if it doesn't start in the first place, it can't get out of hand. It is NOT up to the recipient to complain when it gets too much, they may not want to because they may feel that it will compromise them, it is up to the (supposedly) more mature and experienced of us to know when to stop and how far to take things with an individual. Some cocky young so and so's need it, some need to be treated with a different approach, but it is a responsibility on the senior person, that's what it is all about.

 

[Adam W]

I might have misread your posts Adam but you can't have it both ways. You are right, if it doesn't start in the first place, it can't get out of hand. It is NOT up to the recipient to complain when it gets too much, they may not want to because they may feel that it will compromise them, it is up to the (supposedly) more mature and experienced of us to know when to stop and how far to take things with an individual. Some cocky young so and so's need it, some need to be treated with a different approach, but it is a responsibility on the senior person, that's what it is all about.

It sounds like you've confused someone else's posts with mine, but it shouldn't get to the stage where someone has to complain. If it's believed that "Some cocky young so and so's need it" then the chances are they will have started it, which they shouldn't have done. Maybe in the past it was seen as the place of "a senior person" to end a cocky young apprentice's shenanigans, but I've worked with cocky middle-aged former electrical engineers who have needed putting in their place where practical jokes would have seemed inappropriate. Added to that youngsters nowadays seem more likely to keep going in the belief that they know it all and can 'win'. Again, in the past it was seen as a rite of passage to play practical jokes on the apprentice, while now they might be more likely to retaliate, as it could be argued they are entitled to.

 

[sparksburnout]

Probably Adam, I have been at the home brew. I thought you were agreeing with Aurai, who's comments are wrong in my opinion.
As you say, someone should not have to complain, that is a situation that should have been banished a long time ago. A lot of the guys who "dish it out" are the ones who can't take it, and that is true bullying.