Coronavirus - Keeping it light :-)

[Mike Johnson]

An old tired-looking dog wanders into a guy's yard. He examines the dog's collar and feels his well-fed belly and knows the dog has a home.

The dog follows him into the house, goes down the hall, jumps on the couch, gets comfortable and falls asleep. The man thinks its rather odd, but lets him sleep. After about an hour the dog wakes up, walks to the door and the guy lets him out. The dog wags
his tale and leaves.

The next day the dog comes back and scratches at the door. The guy opens the door, the dog comes in, goes down the hall, jumps on the couch, gets comfortable and falls asleep again. The man lets him sleep. After about an hour the dog wakes up, walks to the
door and the guy lets him out. The dog wags his tale and leaves.

This goes on for days. The guy grows really curious, so he pins a note on the dog's collar: "Your dog has been taking a nap at my house every day."

The next day the dog arrives with another note pinned to his collar: "He lives in a home with four children -- he's trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?'

 

[richy3333]

 

[richy3333]

 

[richy3333]

 

[richy3333]

 

[OnlQQker]

Meanwhile, over at Buckingham Palace...

 

[Julie.]

 

[Deleted account]

Monkey see Monkey do.

Careful there.

Danny Baker was very nearly crucified for similar post.

 

[Mike Johnson]

A cabbie picks up a Nun. The cab driver stares at her. She asks him why he’s staring and he says “I’ve always had a fantasy to kiss a nun.” She says “I’ll kiss you if you’re single and Catholic.” The cab driver says “I’m both!” The nun says “Pull into an alley” The nun then kisses him in a way that would make a hooker blush. Back in the cab, though, the driver starts crying. “I lied. I’m married and Jewish.” The nun says “That’s OK. My name is Kevin and I’m going to a Halloween party”

 

[Mike Johnson]

 

[OnlQQker]

Happy Mothers Day...

 

[Deleted account]

Thanks for the reminder.

literally just phoned me mum.

i didn’t totally forget, card and present sent through post.

 

[OnlQQker]

Over in the Boxing world...

 

[OnlQQker]

 

[Mike Johnson]

Are glass coffins a good idea?

Remains to be seen.


When I die I want the undertaker to stove my skull in with a claymore then bury it along side me with some copper and brass bangles etched with drawings of aliens and flying saucers just to mess with some future archaeologist's mind.