Missing thread?

[Kamikaze]

Guys....You all have loads of posts and have been members for a while.....WHY arent you in the pub?????

I'm a spark with a multiple personality disorder and we’re both not allowed in the pub without a responsible adult. Starting another joke thread isgoing to be difficult since we had all the clean once already and only the filthy trash is leaved now…lol

 

[Phil]

Then surely it should have been deleted and not moved.

no not always. I have to agree with Lenny as the thread is fine for the pub as it is restricted, some threads do need deleting and some are just not appropriate on the open side of the forum but are fine in the pub as they can`t be accessed by young or people that get offended easily

 

[cbw]

I am young and easily offended!

 

[cbw]

Its not true that I am old, fat and Bald!

 

[Phil]

I am young and easily offended!

you had better stop talking to that Durham then

 

[sparky3366]

If I knew how to join the arms, I would...but seeing as I am out of work at the mo cos of illness I don't think I can

 

[Dan]

If you PM myself or Jason with your business details, and providing you have 20 or more posts, we'll let you in the Arms.

If you work for a company, let us know their business details and your position there.

If you are out of work but are a sparky then send us your old business details or the old company you used to work for.

Make sure the details are accurate and true.

We don't use the details ourselves or pass them on to anybody else. We simply keep them on record so that we prevent sales reps and / or customers from getting into the arms, which clearly is the area we discuss such people.

But realistically if you have 20 or more posts and are a sparky, you should really get yourself in there.

 

[sparky3366]

Many thanks Phil, Jason & Dan...pm sent to Jason

 

[trev]

It's expensive when you get access to the arms though guys, the first round is on you. Costs a flippin fortune on a busy night

 

[dingledong]

wouldn't matter trev i'm a sparky loadsa money
but i did try and was barred before i got in

 

[ackbarthestar]

I'm a spark with a multiple personality disorder and we’re both not allowed in the pub without a responsible adult. Starting another joke thread isgoing to be difficult since we had all the clean once already and only the filthy trash is leaved now…lol

There was a bloke, being a schizophrenic, entertained the inmates with his favourite song... and it went like this.....

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm a schizophrenic
and so am I

 

[ackbarthestar]

Well, here's [FONT=&quot][/FONT]something I picked up recently - How to get banned from Tescos

[FONT=&quot]Banned from TESCO’s

Didn't like shopping there anyway. Yesterday I was at my local TESCO’s
store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was
in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog..

What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t,
because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I
woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices
and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally
complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with
my story.) [/FONT][FONT=&quot][/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]
Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an
Irish Setter's **** and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard. I'm now banned from TESCO’s. Better watch what you
ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of
daft things to say.
[/FONT]

 

[spark 68]

*New Zealand Police : Investigation*

An Officer stops at a dairy farm outside of Morrinsville New Zealand and
talks with the old farmer who's the owner.
He tells the farmer, 'I need to inspect your property for illegally grown
marijuana.'

The old Farmer says, 'Okay, but don't go in that field over there..'
The officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the
New Zealand Police with me"!! Pointing to the badge on his chest he proudly
says,
"See this badge"!?
"This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish, on any land, whenever
I want to".
"No questions asked, no answers given".
"Have I made myself clear!!??"
"Do you now understand me!!??"

The old farmer nods politely and goes about his chores.
Later, the old guy hears loud screams and spies the officer running for his
life and close behind is the huge breeder bull.
With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer.
The officer is clearly messing himself..

The old farmer immediately throws down his pitch fork, runs to the fence and
yells at the top of his lungs to the officer.....
"Your badge! Show him your ******* badge!"

 

[Kamikaze]

Lol...Love those!

 

[telectrix]

ditto.....