My sympathy goes out to the wives.

[7029 dave]

Wives, had a couple of them in my time,now it's all down to me no problem what so ever lol.

 

[ferg]

I have an automatic magic carpet. I leave dirty laundry on it and it magically appears in the wardrobe washed dried and ironed.

Funny thing about it though it seems to stop working if the missus gets up in the morning to no coffee and an unlit fire.... Bizzarre I know but hey if it works

 

[overskilled]

I'm ex military (well was military till I got crocked)
Can iron, but don't (well suits I will do etc (AND put RN razor sharp creases into them) but normal clothes...meh)
Laundry I'm better at than the mrs...
Dishes....if I do them then they are ALL clean first time, with her it can take 2 or 4 tries....
Also I know how to empty the vacuum AND clean the filters (amazing how much more it picks up with clean filters......)
I also can shine my own boots (though rarely remember to...should as my feet would probably be a heck of a lot drier with a more regular application of boot polish) when I was in the RN I bet someone I could take a set of boots from dull and disasterous to parade ground colour party bulled standard....they lost...something like 20 minutes the pair and they were like glass.....

 

[Earthstore]

Blimey, glass boots, did you find the Cinderella to wear them???

Just got a picture there of all these chaps lining up on the deck of a ship, all trying these boots on...

 

[overskilled]

Turning up on a passing out parade as part of the colour party / guard with boots anything less than glasslike....to put it mildly would be a mistake of big proportions.....

 

[tidyboiler]

Why am I getting an image of Clive Dunn flashing in my head?

 

[telectrix]

don't panic, mrs geordie, don't panic.

 

[Des 56]

I have a Dishwasher,a Cooker,a Cleaner,a Bed warmer and she performs well in all those functions,with or without instructions


You all should have married Welsh girls
Those sort of nightmare experiences described could never have arisen
I can assure you all,the art of not getting involved with womens work is healthy and strong in these parts, and long may the natural order of life continue

 

[tidyboiler]

don't panic, mrs geordie, don't panic.

:54:

Thankyou cap'n Mannering!!!!!

 

[Geordie Spark]

hmm. obviously you both been lacking in your education.

1. burn the dinner. she won't want you to cook again.

2. mix the white washing with the colours and set the machine on 90deg. she won't ask you to do the washing again.

3. chip a couple of the plates belonging to the dinner service her mother willed to her. you'll never have to wash up again.

4. what's the point of ironing stuff that creases up as soon as you wear it/lie on it/ hang it up?

You know Tel .. since reading that, I'm beginning to see you in a new light - you're not all that much different to a Geordie. (are all Scousers the same as you?)

I think I'm beginning to like you.

 

[Geordie Spark]

I have a Dishwasher,a Cooker,a Cleaner,a Bed warmer and she performs well in all those functions,with or without instructions


You all should have married Welsh girls
Those sort of nightmare experiences described could never have arisen
I can assure you all,the art of not getting involved with womens work is healthy and strong in these parts, and long may the natural order of life continue

Aye, and they have the added bonus of never asking you to buy them a sheepskin coat too. Conversation is a bit limited though ( not such a bad thing? ) as they can only say one word .. Bahhh - or is it Bach??