Standards Manager? HSE

[SirusDvirus]

Are they all cocks or is it just the one that works here?....:fuk2:...
Yes I'm having a bad day

 

[telectrix]

Please expand on that.

 

[SirusDvirus]

Got this new bloke title 'standards manager' but H&S..5th one we've had in 2 years...the last H&S person we had set out a generic risk assessment that covers any maintenance we need to do but he's come in and torn everything up as it 'Does not comply' Now I have to do a Risk Assessment before I do anything that has to be countersigned by me, my supervisor,production manager, managing director and then when I have all the signatures He can sign it to say I can carry out the task..then before I start the task I have to do a 'take 5' which is another short generic risk assessment for pre task safety and type these up that also doesn't include the method statement I need to complete if I'm working on heavy machinery :S

 

[telectrix]

bonkers.

 

[Silly Sausage]

Does any work ever get done at your place?!?!

 

[SirusDvirus]

Yeh..we wait till he's Fked off as he's only here 3 days but he follows us around like a limpet..good greif!!!..
" if any of those boxes aint ticked you dont do the task..gotta protect the stupid!! "....I'm gonna swing for him I swear..lol!

 

[Silly Sausage]

....I'm gonna swing for him I swear..lol!

Haha...."We didn't see anything Officer, he must have tripped over his shoelaces..." :wink_smile:

 

[Spoon]

He's a new guy, probably trying to justify why he has the job. He will be finding more and more things for you to sign. He will also have to cover his arse now as he will get the blame if there are any accidents and there isn't a encyclopaedia of H&S paper work filled out, in triplicate.

 

[ian.settle1]

Have to agree with tearing up the generic RA that covers every job as it would need to be 50 pages long to cover everything.

But have to have 5 signatures for a RA is bonkers

 

[SirusDvirus]

Trouble is the H&S in this place has got so stupid that if we need contractors in they tend to run away screaming with the mere thought never to darken our factory again unless the rumours of alien abduction are true :S

 

[Gage]

I'd just tell the MD to sort the mess out because his machines aren't getting fixed. And if he didn't care then I'd know he was also missing a chromosome, and leave.

 

[Marvo]

Tell the MD you need an assistant to sort out the paperwork so you can go get the work done. If no assistant is forthcoming then just play the game but keep a full log of how much time it's consuming and keep bringing it to their attention until something gives.

 

[ferg]

Or you could just wait it out.
Eventually he'll be buried by a paperwork avalanche

 

[UNG]

Why is it some of these H & S bods have to big up their job and impose some impossible working practices to justify their existence and their impotence.
Been on a few sites where we added a chunk of money on the quote to accommodate the buggeration factor and downtime caused by their H & S man on one site it was close to +100% of the base job cost

The best one I came across was the building services manager at a London college, we were installing a data radio link between the two college sites and at one end we wanted to use the cell mast on the roof for our antenna after some lengthy negotiations with the cell operators regional H&S man and a 90 page fax we were getting nowhere we decided on an alternative mounting method for our antenna and spoke to the building manager who told us that we were wasting our time talking to the cell operator H&S man as his previous job was at that college and he had been fired because no repair work was done in the 2 1/2 years he was there because of his onerous H&S needs. He was so popular with the building manager that if he ever came to site the building manager would throw him off the roof just to see if he had done the correct risk assessment

The one guy it really backfired on was one that suggested I was a two bit contractor (he worked for Serco facilities management) I did a site risk assessment and told him to be on site with the keys at 5:30am the following day so I could get all my kit in without disrupting site and to avoid any possible problems moving kit within the public areas to the roof he didn't like it but had no choice as I had got other people involved because of his arsy attitude and everybody saw it made sense he tried to give us keys but I insisted that he needed to be on site to oversee the kit movement. Strange but over the next few days install we never had a problem with him my parting comment to him was I can be arsy too

 

[TommyM]

I think its just the world we live in these days. H & S gone mad.