Working away from home and eating out

[pirate]

No Tel...it's where you go when you want some male attention...if someone fancies you they head for the loo, and as they pass by your stool (ooh err, missus!) they "tap your ---"...
Mr Michael had a problem with that, cos a man he "tapassed" ended up in hospital with a chocolate bar up his bum...when questioned, Mr George said it was just a Careless Wispa

 

[Pete999]

No Tel...it's where you go when you want some male attention...if someone fancies you they head for the loo, and as they pass by your stool (ooh err, missus!) they "tap your ---"...
Mr Michael had a problem with that, cos a man he "tapassed" ended up in hospital with a chocolate bar up his bum...when questioned, Mr George said it was just a Careless Wispa

Good job it wasn't Snickers bar, especially if you had a nut allergy, crikey just imagine one of those stuck up yer rear end, hard to digest those peanuts. Or a Crunchie bar, all them bubbles would play havoc with your social life.

 

[pirate]

Very true, Pete....a friend told me that!
Mind you, remember Patrick Moore, the astronomer guy...he always said he was a fraud...couldn't tell Mars from me elbow

 

[Pete999]

Very true, Pete....a friend told me that!
Mind you, remember Patrick Moore, the astronomer guy...he always said he was a fraud...couldn't tell Mars from me elbow

Bet Mr George could.

 

[pirate]

oi! where's the Post New Thread button gone?

 

[littlespark]

Is that what's known as a "fun size" mars bar?

I suppose all them mentioned so far is better than a toblerone.

Anyone feeling peckish?

 

[pirate]

Aye, remember Billy Connolly:
"Toblerone? WTF that all about? A sweetie that hurts you!"
Many years ago I started a thread on another forum about Mars Bars, how do you eat yours?...
It got closed down after a short while...too many references to Marianne Faithfull, allegedly

brings a whole new meaning to a Cadbury's Chocolate Finger...
or the song about a Finger Of Fudge...

 

[Pete999]

Bet Mr George could.

Just remembered another story from my travels if you are interested, The former Soviet Union, just prior to Perestroika and Glasnost. Went with 3 other lads as a sort of scouting party, booked into the Hotel, and because I had been posted there previously, and could speak pigeon Russian, I had become a sort of tour guide, crikey imagine that?
Anyhow ends up at one of the pedestrian areas looking for somewhere to eat, not many Restaurants about in those days, at least none you would want to take your Wife to.
Ends up at this little place, couple of Local Lads drinking there, and did we want any help reading the Menu, no thanks think we can manage.
Turns out you could have Fish or Biff (steak) and believe me after ,Chernobyl leave the Fish alone, Mick the largest of our party was starving, and we had all decided on Biff, is it Big says Mick and can we have chips, oh yes very big and you can have Pomme Frittes, WTF are Pomme Frittes Mick says, don't worry Mick that's Frog for Chips, anyhow the Biff may have been big before Matey had cut it into 4, Mick was no a happy chappy, never trusted me to order the food for a long time.

 

[littlespark]

Holidayed in France a couple years back. Went to a family type restaurant and tried to read the menu. (It was ok, there was pictures)
My wife recognised the French word for goat near a picture of a burger.
"Have that" she says... "Its goats cheese on that"

Fine... Ordered the meal... kids had cheese and ham toasties under a fancy name, wife had a seafoody thing and I got my burger with goats cheese.
Didn't taste like goats cheese.
In fact, the burger didn't taste of beef.

Goat burger is actually quite nice

 

[Pete999]

Holidayed in France a couple years back. Went to a family type restaurant and tried to read the menu. (It was ok, there was pictures)
My wife recognised the French word for goat near a picture of a burger.
"Have that" she says... "Its goats cheese on that"

Fine... Ordered the meal... kids had cheese and ham toasties under a fancy name, wife had a seafoody thing and I got my burger with goats cheese.
Didn't taste like goats cheese.
In fact, the burger didn't taste of beef.

Goat burger is actually quite nice

Just wait until you try Uzbekistan Kebabs, a joy to be avoided.

 

[MJPD29]

There was a stage when I never wanted to see mcdonalds or subway again. I'd blame working away on gaining weight, but realistically I was just too lazy to make anything

 

[Pete999]

There was a stage when I never wanted to see mcdonalds or subway again. I'd blame working away on gaining weight, but realistically I was just too lazy to make anything

You may think differently Matthew if you have worked in some of the places I have, sometimes MDs can be the difference between starving and getting the runs believe me I have a vast experience, weight increase can be the least of your worries.

 

[pirate]

I like goat...eat it quite often in Spain, but have never seen it on offer here. Knowing my luck, if I did see it and order it, someone else would get it...
as in get my goat?

Also, no joke, in Spain a goat is "cabra"
leg is "pata"
and nickname pata de cabra is a crowbar
but that's enough useless info for tonight

 

[Squid]

Worked in Milan years back and as I was working for a Japanese Comms company (in the 80's) they always flew you out business class and if staying overnight they would book you in to a 5* hotel, the food allowance was £15, try finding something to eat late in the evening at the Savoy for £15 luckily I found a Burger King around the corner, the concierge did give me a funny look as I walked back through the lobby carrying the BK bag........

Also watching Minder on the TV in Italian was interesting but not as interesting as running the bath, tipping out the bubble bath and pressing all the buttons and walking two minutes later to find the jacuzzi bath had frothed up the foam halfway to the ceiling...........

 

[billyblade]

We were in Bavaria some years ago and when we got back to the hotel they'd stopped doing food. The gaffer agreed to drive into the nearest town to find a restaurant that was open late. We stumbled across the "Restaurant Olympia" in Landsberg and decided to go in. It turned out to be a Greek restaurant with a menu in German and waiters that couldn't speak any English.
I said I might be able to get us by with my schoolboy German and promptly ordered 4 large beers. I struggled with the menu but seeing as the gaffer was there jokingly suggested the most expensive meal on the menu. It was before the Euro and was about £40 (this was back in around 1994). The gaffer was just about to go apeshit at my suggestion when I noticed that underneath it said it was for 4 people and there were 4 of us. I mentioned it might be a good idea then we wouldn't be arguing over whose meal looked best. So we ordered it.
At first they brought out a salad each and a tray of chips (result, I thought. At the very worst - salad and chips).
Then the kitchen door opened. 2 waiters staggered out carrying a plate between them that was about 3 feet across. There was all manner of meat piled on it into a mountain then on the very top was an orange with lit sparklers in it. A fanfare was played over the music system and the rest of the diners applauded. Just a bit embarrassing!!!

The same trip, my colleague needed the toilet in another restaurant and asked if I knew where it was. I didn't. He said "I'll ask". I said "do you know how to?" and he shot me a "really?" glance. He then got up and proceeded to ask the waitress "Wo ist der scheissen-hausen?". Just imagine a foreigner coming up to you and asking you where the shithouse is!!
On the way home we stopped in Luxembourg at breakfast time and stopped at a cafe. "Sheissen-hausen" bloke needed the Scheissen-hausen and disappeared. By the time he'd come back we'd already ordered off the french menu (2 omelettes and a "petit-dejeuner" continental). The waitress was waiting to take his order and feeling rushed ordered the only thing on the menu he recognised - Spaghetti Bolognaise! It was about 6.30am!!!!