" Hello Pirate, I've got a new tenant coming in next week. Can you come and do the PAT testing (sic)"
"Yes, of course...what have you got?"
"Oh, just a kettle, microwave, toaster, oven and hob...and maybe 6 table lamps, stuff like that".
"Why do you want me to come and test them?"
"Because I want to be able to demonstrate that I have at least tried to make sure they are safe for the tenant to use"
"OK, fair enough. I'll need to do a full risk assessment, including PA testing of my drill in case I need to use it to make some holes in the walls"
"WHAT???"
"Can't have it blowing up and killing us both, can I?"
"Are you serious. Pirate?"
"No! I'll do it myself, and as I don't employ anyone else, I can just get on with it...but you will have to stay at a safe distance, obviously"
"Whew! I was a bit worried there! So, you will come round and test these items so that they are safe to use? That's it?"
"Yup, just like that!"
"May I ask how much it will cost?"
"Of course! You are half an hour away, you have maybe a dozen items to test, assuming no problems, maybe an hour...how about £80?. I'll do the paperwork in the evening and email you the results, but I'll sticker the passes at the time."
"How about £50?"
"Oh...what's the rent?"
" £1500/month"
"No"