Things an Electrician would never say

[cjm500]

"No of course I don't need to turn the power off while I change your consumer unit"

"Yes that's fine - you go to Pakistan for 6 weeks and just pay me for your rewire when you get back"

"All those extras you've asked for then moaned about the rewire being behind schedule? Of course they're not on the invoice, I did them all for free!"

"No of course it doesn't matter that you've boarded your loft, put a laminate floor down and a bed and a wardrobe - why would I need to go up there?"

"Course it's safe - it's always worked OK hasn't it?"

"Yes I'd love to certify off your DIY rewire. No of course it doesn't matter that you've wired the shower in 2.5 off a 32A breaker and tapped the cellar lights off the kitchen ring. Bonding? No - never heard of it. Paying me? Just get us a pint when you next see us"

 

[trev]

How about

Happy birthday darling wife. Of course you can watch your new Westlife dvd ALL BLOODY NIGHT!!!!!!

 

[Kamikaze]

I wonder if there is a prize for "Meltdown of the week"? :biggrin:

 

[Knobhead]

watch your new Westlife dvd ALL BLOODY NIGHT!!!!!!

It was me that got divorced for unreasonable behaviour mg_smile:

 

[kenny james]

i am a plasterer by trade

 

[wildgoose]

It's normal for the sockets and light switches to be completley overplastered. There are really easy to locate and dig out!!!

 

[Bobster]

Earth's are for whimps

 

[Kamikaze]

Electricians are really easy to get along with once people learn to worship us. :17:

 

[Kiers1970]

you've had a price of £500, yet the materials are £300, and labour costs to me are £450? 'course I can match that price.

 

[SPARTYKUS]

I'll do that for free

 

[SPARTYKUS]

Yes sellotape will do just as good a job.

 

[Knobhead]

Kamikaze,
Love the new signature.

Sent from my bed via a bit of wire.

 

[Victor]

Connector blocks are too expensive, its cheaper just to twist the wires together. As for insulation tape, why should i buy those silly little rolls when I can get a big roll of Scellotape for much less money that does the job just as well.


This must have been quoted buy the cowboy who's installation I had to rip out and start again last year. (NO JOKE IT'S TRUE)

 

[Cammy]

'We don't have the fuse for that underfloor heating system.. Better go look for one'
'No. Stupid. I'll just strip back some of this flex and use a strand of that'

Another, sadly, true story.

 

[Kamikaze]

If you are grouchy, irritable, or just plain mean, there will be a £20 charge for putting up with you.