A new jokes thread for your amusement.

[RmBo_0]

Roses are red,
Violets are glorious,
Don't try to surprise
Oscar Pistorius.

 

[telectrix]

but was he pist, legless, or guilty.

 

[RmBo_0]

I think he just got cold feet about the relationship.

 

[telectrix]

well, he's going to need to steel himself for some heavy police questioning.

 

[RmBo_0]

And just when he had the world at his knees.

 

[MarkieSparkie]

I don't think he has a leg to stand on!

 

[dan86]

The newspapers have been publishing pictures of Kate Middletons tiny bump.

So that's all three of them photographed now then.

 

[sparkwood]

roses are red violets are glorious never sneak up on Oscar Pistorious !!!

 

[sparkwood]

did you know its illegal to have ---- sex in iceland........not sure if its the same in farmfoods lol

 

[sparkwood]

my mate went to the doctors on wednesday because he shouts COME ON MAN UTD everytime he masturbates...........the doctor told him most w**kers do !!!!

 

[dan86]

I see what Pistorius is doing. He is going to jail for 25 year and when he gets released...Bang! President of South Africa. That's how it works over there, right?

 

[tomplumbuk]

my mate went to the doctors on wednesday because he shouts COME ON MAN UTD everytime he masturbates...........the doctor told him most w**kers do !!!!

Too true - LOL!

 

[hubsy]

Is this sad or funny.


woman goes into a shop on Valentines day.
assistant asks her what she got for valentines day
NOTHING she said, my partner cheated on me last night.
then she burst into tears.

Its true...

 

[dan86]

FOR SALE

Full set of mechanics tools and overalls.

£500 ono.

Contact Sally Webster.

4 Coronation Street.

 

[Rappid]

What's black bushy and found down school girls knickers?
Kevin Webster's moustache